When faced with conflict most of us react out of emotion rather than well intentioned responses. Our self-preserving defense mechanisms can take over and direct our behavior. Anger, fear, anxiety, depression, can all be examples of these emotions. Yelling, fighting, withdrawal, and substance abuse are examples of the behavior. How often have your emotions been in charge of your behavior rather than your best self? All behavior is learned. Anything we learn can be unlearned and relearned. How we feel is important, it is information that we need to listen to. However, we are generally not served well when we let our feelings control our behavior.
I focus on helping your “best self” be more in control of your behavior. To be more aware of and listen to what your feelings and defenses are telling you rather than let them control your behavior. Your vision of how you want to live and behave controls your behavior rather than your past learned defenses and feelings.